


Through the Screen

by sunshineflying



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Camboy Harry, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-22
Updated: 2015-08-22
Packaged: 2018-04-16 13:23:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4626831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshineflying/pseuds/sunshineflying
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In his free time, Niall Horan likes to subscribe to his favourite camboy, Harry Cox. When he moves to uni he's not sure how he'll manage to watch the weekly show with a roommate. Things become even more complicated with that roommate is the one and only camboy of his dreams - Harry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Through the Screen

**Author's Note:**

  * For [forthemoon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/forthemoon/gifts).



> Where do I begin? Thank you to my prompter [rayvans](http://archiveofourown/users/rayvans) \- I had fun writing this! I hope you enjoy it :)
> 
> I also want to thank [Shannon](http://broken-drums.tumblr.com/) for her help as a last minute beta. She's wonderful and helped me fix all the nuanced differences between UK and US unis - this fic would be a mess without her!
> 
> Thanks also to the folks over at the [Niall/Harry Fic Exchange](http://niallharryficexchange.tumblr.com/) for coordinating this exchange.

Niall has never really been “out” in his hometown. The people there had known him his whole life; it would feel strange to let them know intimate details about his sex life. Instead, he keeps it behind closed doors.

Namely, he keeps it on his laptop.

He’d felt so dirty the first time, searching for cam boys, but he got surprisingly good results given his cautiousness. Before long, he’d become a subscriber because the little sixty-second preview clips of the cam boys on the website just didn’t do it for Niall anymore.

He became especially enamoured with one boy in particular: a lean, muscular, curly-haired brunette named Harry Cox. His hair fell softly over his broad shoulders and his lips always looked deliciously red and plump. Before long, Harry’s shows were the only live sessions Niall ever tuned in for.

It was sinful, watching someone so tall and strong take toy after toy on camera just because somebody paid him to do it. Most nights Niall just tuned in to watch, but sometimes he did more, like on the Monday night when Niall’s pretty sure he first fell in love with the guy.

\--

_Harry switches on the camera, still partially dressed. He always is, only usually he’s wearing pants and trousers instead of an oversized hoodie and tiny briefs. Niall’s heart races at how cute and cozy Harry looks like this – he finds himself wishing Harry would dress like this more often._

_He sits down, knees bent toward his chest on the sofa in front of the camera, his long sleeves covering his hands as he clutches a mug of tea. Niall notices that he looks a little pale; even his lips don’t carry the regular red tint and plumpness they usually do. Everything about this session feels off to Niall._

_“Hi all,” Harry begins, waving to the camera._

_He’s sick; Niall can hear it in his voice before Harry even has a chance to blink slowly, tiredly at the camera._

_“I’m sick,” Harry announces, his voice hoarse and raspy. Niall’s stomach knots because it’s the same way he sounds after deep-throating a dildo. Terribly, he finds himself wanting to see that again._

_“I can’t sleep,” Harry continues. “I’m here hoping you guys can help me out. I always sleep better after I come really hard.”_

_He smiles at them – really truly smiles, not that half-smirk he sometimes does to get them riled up – and as he shifts Niall can see that Harry’s eyes are puffy and a little red, like he’s tried to sleep or already has, but couldn’t stay that way for long. He feels pity growing in the depths of his chest – nobody should have to fuck on camera when they’re as ill as Harry, Niall thinks._

_“Who do we have here tonight?” Harry asks. He leans forward to look at the chat room portion of the screen. As he does, his hoodie rides up and his briefs are more exposed. Usually Harry’s half-hard when he starts his show, but today he’s not. Niall’s full-on frowning by this point, seeing Harry so put-out just to do his job. “Only a few,” Harry comments after a moment. He’s trying to sound casual, Niall can tell, but there’s also a trace of disappointment in his tone that doesn’t go unnoticed. “Looks like you special few get a nearly private showing.”_

_He’s forcing a smile now, trying to be optimistic, especially since there’s at least one impatient bloke who’s paid and demanded a sexual act from Harry by this point, usually. Harry sets his mug aside and shifts so he can sprawl out on the sofa a little more. He lets a hand drift under his hoodie, dragging some of the fabric with so his pants are fully exposed as well as some of his tummy._

_Niall looks at the dismal list of three names in the chat room and wills one of them to pay. He’s starting to feel secondhand embarrassment for Harry, seeing that nobody’s actually paying for him to do something. Harry tugs his lower lip between his teeth and moans as he drifts his fingers feather-light over the outline of his cock in his pants, but still nothing._

_Feeling too awkward for words, Niall fumbles in his wallet for his credit card – in case of emergency, that’s what he’d gotten it for – and put forth far more money than he’d ever admit to just to pay Harry to do something._

_As he strokes himself in time with the rhythm Harry’s using to fuck himself with a candy-pink, sparkling dildo, Niall tries to tell himself that it was worth it._

_When Harry comes and nearly falls asleep right there from exhaustion and sickness, Niall knows it was money well spent._

_But instead of thinking over and over again about how good Harry had looked as he squirmed away after he came, still fucking himself on the dildo just because someone asked him to keep going, Niall can’t get the image of Harry cuddled up in his hoodie with a cuppa out of his head._

_He’d looked so domestic, so sweet, that Niall finds himself flushing at the realization that he wants to see that side of Harry as much as he wants to see the sexy side._

\--

Niall knew he was too far gone to be saved when Harry had admitted the following week that his orgasm from Niall (or NaughtyIrish13, rather) was the best he’d ever had. Niall was lucky he already had a university fund because every spare bit of change went to Niall’s spank bank – or more accurately, Harry’s actual bank account. He held back from using his credit card after that first night, but only because he found out his mum still gets the bank statements.

He’d spend far more money if she didn’t.

As for when he actually went off to Uni, Niall wasn’t sure what he was going to do. Every Monday night like clockwork, he hid in his room with the door locked and headphones on so he can tune in right away at ten pm to watch Harry. Having a roommate was going to seriously complicate things, and getting a single room this close to term would be near impossible.

He felt a little better the week before his big move to the dorms though, because Harry would miss the following week’s show as well.

\--

_“It’s just a little move, but no worries!” he says as he flashes everyone his winning smile, the one that shows off his perfectly aligned white teeth and adorable dimples. “I’m going to be back the week after that with a special surprise.”_

_Niall’s sure Harry is seeing tons of messages in reply to his news, but he only replies to one – and it’s totally unrelated. With a big grin on his face, he says, “Why yes, BradfordBadBoii, I_ did _get a new tattoo.”_

_Harry arches his back and lifts his plain white shirt to show off mirroring branches on his hips. “Two, actually,” he says with a laugh. He smiles as he sees all the praise pour in – even Niall compliments him on them even though he doesn’t quite understand their meaning._

_Niall doesn’t have any tattoos, mostly because he’s given all his money to Harry, but also because he’s always been a little scared of the pain. Tattoos look good on Harry though, which is a good thing, since he’s got a ton. Niall is fairly certain he’s memorized them all._

_He’s also positive that does not make him obsessed._

\--

After that live stream, Niall relaxes in knowing that he won’t have to miss one of Harry’s shows. It means he can focus on his packing so he doesn’t forget anything when he moves from Ireland to London. His roommate papers never quite made it to him, so he’s hoping it means he got a single room, after all. He’d been petitioned but warned that it’s highly unlikely – he’s holding out hope that it happened anyway.

He flies to London early on a Saturday, before the sun is even up. He does his best to gather his huge luggage, promising his parents that he’ll call if he’s forgotten anything. They keep insisting they’ll post him more of his things, but he tells them not to – he’s not moving away forever, after all.

After begging his father not to take him all the way to London – money was tight, after all – he arrives in London a bit early for his slot. He has a couple of hours to wait so he leaves his luggage with the staff and decides to go shopping for some blankets for his bed. It doesn’t even take an hour, and when he gets back, the staff have unearthed their keys and are ready to check him into his room. He gets the keys and listens as they try to explain the massive rules packet and everything he needs to do when he gets to his room.

Niall doesn’t really care – he’s ready for a nap.

When he finally reaches his room on the sixth floor, Niall is relieved. He’s tired and he’s ready to settle in for the day and nap while everyone else arrives. He doesn’t even bother unpacking – he just puts his sheets on his bed and climbs under the covers, calling dibs on the lower bunk.

When he wakes up hours later, he thinks he’s still dreaming.

The first thing he sees are the branch tattoos he remembered someone pointing out during the live stream. Whoever copied them is his roommate, and is currently putting blankets on the bed. Niall awkwardly thinks that it could be worse – at least he and his roommate are both fans of Harry Cox and can avoid each other on nights when he does his show.

Niall stirs on the bed and his roommate freezes. “Oh – sorry. Did I wake you?”

With wide eyes, realization settles on Niall. He’d recognize that voice anywhere. He’s heard filthy things come out of beautiful red lips in that very voice. Things he can’t unhear.

The guy steps down and Niall looks up to find himself face to face with Harry Fucking Cox.

It takes Niall longer than is appropriate for him to compose himself enough to reply. “No big deal,” he insists with a nervous laugh. “I shouldn’t sleep all day, anyway.”

Harry smiles and holds out his hand. Niall stares at it for a beat – he knows all the naughty places that hand has been – but Harry doesn’t know that. Niall reminds himself of this fact and then reaches out to shake his hand. “I’m Niall Horan,” he says.

“Harry Styles,” replies Harry.

Niall almost – _almost_ – corrects him, but he bites his tongue. Of course Harry would be under a different name – or at least something slightly different and far dirtier.

The handshake is innocent and cordial, and even though Harry looked slightly bewildered when Niall introduced himself, he’s pretty sure his secret is safe. Harry has no idea that he’s NaughtyIrish13 – or so he hopes. He’s clearly picked up on the _Irish_ bit, with Niall having an accent and all, but there are tons of naughty Irishmen in the world. Niall lets out a tense breath.

Never in a million years had he expected the very boy he got off to online to be the one he’d be rooming with for a whole year.

“Well… I’m going with some friends to the activities fair… I’ll see you later? Unless you’d like to come with…” Harry stammers.

Niall flushes red and looks at Harry’s perfectly unpacked parts of the room and says, “I should probably unpack. But thanks.”

“Of course. Maybe we can meet up for dinner?” Harry suggests. “I’ll come back here and get you.”

“Okay,” Niall nods.

Harry gathers his wallet and puts a big hat on his head before he walks out the door.

Niall tries his best to pull his thoughts together. When he’s not putting on a show, Harry still looks sinful. He plays with his lips, both with his fingers and teeth, so they’re constantly red, and his jeans leave very little to the imagination with how tightly they cling to him. He’s sweet and acts so innocently that Niall almost doesn’t believe this is the same Harry who does cam shows at night. Almost.

After meeting Harry, Niall can’t stop thinking about him. Even as he unpacks and should be focused on where he’s putting things, he doesn’t bother – all that’s on his mind are the intimate things he’s seen Harry do. He’s not sure how he’s going to survive a full year – especially because he doesn’t want to unsubscribe. That would just be dumb, and it would probably be a dead giveaway that _he’s_ NaughtyIrish13.

But on top of wondering how he’s going to survive a whole year of rooming with his favourite cam boy, Niall can’t stop thinking about how Harry is going to do his livestream now. He _did_ say he’d be back, after all. Granted, he doesn’t know where Harry’s moved from, but it must be far considering he’s staying in halls.

After a busy freshers week  – the week that caused Harry to miss his cam show – their first day of classes comes up before they know it. Niall’s especially caught off guard by this because after a full day of classes he’s now got to figure out how in the world the livestream is going to happen. Harry hasn’t asked him to leave, which Niall would have happily done. Instead, Harry hasn’t come back and it makes perfect sense. Harry’s got somewhere else to go – a studio owned by the website maybe? His family’s house?

Niall’s curiosity is piqued and he tunes in earlier than he usually does. Nobody else is there yet, but the room is open, meaning Harry’s somewhere around.

\--

_When the video comes into view, Harry’s in the same room as usual. Only this time Niall knows it’s not Harry’s – the closet is still bursting with clothes and not a single item looks like something Harry wears. He’s smiling and distracted as he brushes back some hair from his face, daintily tucking it behind his ear as he sits shirtless on the sofa._

_As usual, Harry looks incredibly sexy in his tight trousers. Niall can’t stop staring at his perfectly toned thighs – he has the fleeting thought that they’d look so beautiful, straining while Harry rides him – and he swallows hard as he watches Harry settle in._

_With glasses._

_It wouldn’t be such a big deal, except for the fact that Niall had made the offhanded comment just the night before that they looked good on him. Harry confessed he’d been self-conscious about them and didn’t usually let people see him wearing them, but Niall insisted they looked amazing._

_And now Harry’s wearing them on camera and that means Niall won’t be able to look Harry in the eye without feeling ashamed, especially when he’s in those glasses. He’s sure Harry’s wearing them because of how Niall complimented him the night before. His stomach makes a funny knot and he feels tense as he watches now. Everything is so strange now that he knows Harry personally, but Niall can’t help watching. He’s far too gone for Harry and all the things he does when he’s on camera._

_“Hi guys,” Harry smiles coyly, pulling a leg to his chest so he looks smaller and more innocent. “I’m back.”_

_And god, he looks so beautiful, pink lips pulled into a smile, dimples showing in the shadows, those glasses on his face. Niall’s so glad he picked up some extra shifts before moving so he’d be able to start out the school year by paying for a stellar show from Harry._

_Harry’s smile brightens as he watches kind ‘welcome back’ messages pop up on his screen, including one from Niall. “I moved to uni last week,” he explains. “It’s brilliant. My new roommate is great – he’s the reason I’ve put on these glasses for you lot. He says they look good so I wanted to see what you guys had to say.”_

_He pushes them up the bridge of his nose, the thick black frames contrasting beautifully against his fair skin. He leans in to read a few messages and his cheeks flush as he bites his lip. "No, he doesn’t like me like that,” Harry says with a hint of wistfulness in his voice that doesn’t go unnoticed by Niall. His heart starts beating harder as he hangs off of Harry’s every word. “He’s proper fit but I’m pretty sure he’s too straight for me.”_

_Niall feels indescribable. He’s shocked, he’s surprised – he’s especially confused because why would Harry tell his random followers about him? Part of him wants to feel special and pay really well, but the rest of him is thinking about what Harry’s just said – what it means._

_But Niall’s brain nags at him: does he really come off that way? Too straight? He’d tried hard to blend in whilst living in Ireland but he was pretty sure that compliments as sweet as the ones he’d given Harry were a dead giveaway. That, and the fact that Niall had a bad habit of staring, especially at Harry’s arse._

_Harry’s face brightens quickly as he receives piles of compliments on his glasses, as well as at least a dozen variations of “wow your roommate is an idiot” and “is he blind? you’re gorgeous!” Harry valiantly tries to defend Niall but it’s clear that he’s on a schedule so he starts asking for requests._

_Still stinging from Harry’s earlier comment, Niall doesn’t participate. He’s got a sense of foreboding in him, and he’s surprised he’s still watching. He’s hurt – he’s tried to be out, at least a little bit – that’s a big part of why he’d wanted to move to a different country for uni._

_Unlike all of the other times Niall tunes in for one of Harry’s livestreams, this time he doesn’t come. He doesn’t feel like getting off. He stays in the room so Harry doesn’t get suspicious, but that’s it._

\--

Niall climbs into bed once the livestream is over, but he can’t fall asleep. He keeps thinking about it – how he wishes he could be so obviously out like Harry is, or that his roommate wouldn’t count him out so easily – but it’s not like any of it is actually Harry’s fault. Niall pretends to be asleep when he hears the lock on the door click, and quietly Harry wanders inside. He drops a duffel bag – Niall’s stomach knots as he realizes that could be his toys – and he squishes his eyes shut and rolls to face the wall as Harry locks the door behind him.

After only a few minutes, he hears Harry climb into bed, and before long his steady breathing can be heard in the room. Niall rolls over again, fitful from being unable to sleep, and tries to ignore the fact that he can still see a few spots of come on Harry’s glasses. He’d made quite the mess on the livestream – Niall would have loved it if he hadn’t been so hurt.

When Niall wakes up the next morning, everything feels wrong. Harry is usually awake and gone before him, but that morning he’s not. Niall’s pretty sure he’s supposed to be in class. Gently, he climbs out of bed and reaches up to the top bunk to jostle his roommate. “Harry?” Niall asks, “Don’t you have class?”

Harry is groggy and unintelligible, so Niall tries again. This time he gets the reaction he’s looking for: Harry bolts upright in a panic. He glances at the clock, groans, and lays back on his bed with his arm over his eyes. “My class is half over,” he says with disdain.

Niall frowns. “I’m sorry.”

“’s not your fault,” Harry mumbles. He rubs at his eyes, still puffy from sleep, and then looks around the room. “I had a bad night, is all. I wasn’t thinking and I went to bed without an alarm.”

Niall knows it’s reckless and probably futile, but he sits down on a chair by the desk, looking up at Harry on the top bunk, and asks, “What happened to make your night so terrible?”

Harry purses his lips and hesitates before he says, “I just… I didn’t make the money I’d hoped I would. My best customer has sort of stopped doing business.”

Niall is actually genuinely impressed, hearing the answer. If he didn’t know Harry’s secret, hadn’t seen him fuck himself on camera with toys for money, he’d never believe it. Not by that description. But beyond that, Niall is riddled with guilt. He’d saved up so much to surprise Harry, but then never did and now Harry is short on money. It’s not like Harry knew he’d upset him by saying what he did – it seems unfair.

Feeling selfish and guilty are some of Niall’s least favorite things, so he wants to fix it right away. “When’s your next class?” he asks.

“Two… this afternoon,” Harry replies, yawning.

“Well, get up and get dressed – we’ll go get tea and lounge on the green.” Niall suggests. “My treat.”

Harry looks at Niall with an unreadable expression, like he’s trying to figure out if it’s out of pity or friendship that he’s suggesting. “You don’t have to,” he settles.

“I know,” Niall nods. “But I want to. So what do you say?” Niall realizes he’s facing the very real possibility of a rejection, but hopes for the best.

“Okay.”

It’s just tea, and Harry has no idea what’s going on in Niall’s head or that Niall is his best customer, so the outing is pretty platonic. Niall pulls on some jeans and a plaid shirt while Harry shimmies into some tight black jeans and a plain white tee-shirt, still too tired to dress any fancier than that. Niall doesn’t mind. He thinks Harry looks good in white.

Once they’ve dressed and cleaned themselves up, they head out onto campus proper. There’s a café and a large green not far from their dorm, but even so, it’s a nice walk.

Except it’s totally awkward.

Niall doesn’t know what to say to Harry, because everything that’s on the tip of his tongue is a dead giveaway as to who he is and how much he’s paid Harry to take off his clothes and do filthy things to himself. Harry seems to sleepy to talk, though, which puts Niall at ease.

He pays for their breakfast as promised – tea and a morning croissant for each – and then they go sit out on the green. “So Harry,” Niall begins awkwardly. “Tell me more about yourself.”

Harry crosses his legs in the grass and looks over at Niall as he swallows a bite of his breakfast. “Well… there’s not much to tell, I guess,” he says softly. “I’ve got a mum, a dad, a stepdad, and a sister. I want to teach nursery school.” Niall nearly chokes on his tea at that. “And full disclosure: I’m gay.” Harry says the last bit like he’s ripping off a plaster, getting the hard part over with, nice and fast.

 _No kidding you’re gay,_ Niall thinks as his memory flashes back to all the times he’s watched Harry get off while riding toys or lying on his back and taking them, nice and deep. He shifts as he feels all the blood in his body rush to his cock. He replies, his voice a bit strangled, “Really? That’s cool. I never would have guessed.”

It’s a hint at what Harry said the night before about Niall, in a roundabout sort of way, but Harry doesn’t catch on. “Sorry it’s weird,” Harry offers, like he thinks Niall won’t want to room with him now, like he’s got to apologize for being who he is.

“Hey, don’t apologize,” Niall says. He takes another sip of tea and offers casually, “I’m bi, so.”

Harry seems genuinely surprised by the news. “You are?” he asks incredulously. “I had no idea.”

“I mean, I never really came out back in Ireland. Like, you’d never know if you looked at my Facebook or anything. But yeah… I am,” Niall confesses.

“If you weren’t out in Ireland, then how did you like – figure it out?” Harry wonders.

Niall shrugs. It’s a complicated story. “I stayed at my friend’s house one night. It was like three in the morning and he just asks out of nowhere if I’d ever wondered what it’s like to be gay. His words. I’d kissed girls already – I was like fourteen I think. But I said yeah because I didn’t want him to feel awkward. Then he kissed me. And the funniest part? He didn’t like it, but I did. And he was the one who’d been thinking about it for ages.” Niall laughs dryly. “I didn’t know being bi was an option at the time, so I had a little crisis because I liked it the same way I did with girls.

“And like… all those times I’d noticed when a bloke had a nice arse or something totally made sense after that. Some awkward Google searches a little later sort of led me to the idea of being bi and now here I am.” Niall takes a deep breath and looks at Harry. “I didn’t come out, though. My family… I dunno how they’d take it. So I decided I’d only come out about it if I found myself wanting to marry a guy. I’d hate to cause a big upset in my family and then end up marrying a girl.” He pauses. “God that sounds awful.” Niall shakes his head, glad Harry’s letting him get it all out. “Anyway… what about you? How’d you know?”

Harry pauses for a moment, like he’s gathering his thoughts, before he says, “I knew before I can remember knowing, cliché as it sounds. I guess I’d tell my mum when a boy on the playground was cute and stuff, but I’d never say the same thing about girls. I’ve just sort of grown up this way.”

“Lucky,” Niall says wistfully. “I wish it’d been that easy for me.”

They share a glance and now Niall notices that Harry’s looking at him differently. His cheeks are flushed and his eyes seem darker. “Can I ask you something sort of personal?” Harry asks, voice breaking the pause.

“Sure,” Niall nods.

“Are you a virgin?”

Niall’s expression softens when he looks at Harry and sees how nervous he was to ask that.

“No, but I haven’t slept with a guy yet,” Niall confesses. “Just one girl.”

“So you’ve just done it the one time?”

Niall smiles to try to relax Harry; he doesn’t mind talking about this. He’s more curious as to why Harry is asking. Does he think he’s had too much sex for someone his age? Considering his job, it’s perfectly acceptable, but Niall doesn’t want to let on that he knows. It’s getting more challenging, but he feels like he’s keeping the secret petty well.

“I did it a few times with the same girl,” Niall explains. “We broke up though. Think I might have a go with a guy while I’m here, though. I’m hoping to.”

Now they’re both red in the face and can’t look each other right in the eye. Niall wants Harry to be the guy to have a go with him, to be his first time. He looks ace in bed from what he’s seen online, plus he’s a genuinely sweet guy and knows what he’s doing. Niall feels like he’ll be well taken care of with Harry. To try to relax Harry, Niall asks, “What about you? Are you a virgin?”

“Umm…” Harry pauses and bites his lip. “No, I’m not. But I’m not seeing anyone.”

Their eyes meet and Niall feels an ache in his chest when he sees a flash of fear in Harry’s eyes, like he’s afraid every sentence will give away his secret. He doesn’t want anyone to find out, clearly.

Niall smiles warmly and acts oblivious as he stands, brushing grass off of his bum. “Well, I have to get to class, but we should do this again sometime. Maybe I can text you and we can grab dinner?” Niall asks.

Harry laughs – Niall seems so awkward and formal, it’s funny. “Sure. See you later. Thanks again for breakfast.”

Niall waves as he walks away, wondering how on earth he’s going to get out of the hole he’s dug for himself. The more he gets to know Harry, the guiltier he feels about subscribing to his cam shows and paying him to get himself off on camera.

It starts to become a problem for Niall, after a while. He’s constantly broke, encouraging Harry’s secret profession, until finally his new best friend puts his foot down. “Niall Horan, how are you seriously still broke?” Louis Tomlinson shouts as they’re playing football out in the green

“I’m just… I am,” Niall says lamely, kicking the ball back to him.

“You work,” Louis argues. He runs to catch the ball under his torn up black and white Vans, and then kicks it back to Niall as he says, “It’s been months since you got that radio job. You’re never buying groceries, so where is the money going?”

Niall catches the ball with his hands as it flies right up toward his face – probably on purpose. Louis is on the football team and takes every opportunity to show off that fact whilst playing for fun outdoors with his friends. Niall sighs and looks around before he starts to walk toward Louis.

Louis smirks, knowing this is going to be good, and walks over to Niall. “ _Yes_ I knew there was a reason!” he says excitedly.

“Oi,” Niall says, smacking Louis gently upside the head. “You keep quiet about this. I mean it. _Nobody_ can know.”

“Are you buying drugs? Getting strippers? What’s the secret, Nialler?” he asks eagerly.

Niall holds the football under one arm as he walks to sit under a tree. Louis sits down next to him and relaxes a little. His voice is calmer as he asks, “Alright, so what’s going on with you?”

So Niall sighs and explains the whole thing. The staying closeted in Ireland, the way he found Harry online, the way he had _no_ warning about his roommate, and everything that’s been on his mind since the whole crazy mess began. Louis keeps quiet during the whole thing and Niall’s so grateful that he can sit and listen and offer advice, because he’d been afraid Louis wouldn’t, that he’d mock him, because Louis is a loud person with a big personality and they’re still getting to know him.

“You’ve got to quit that site, mate,” is all Louis says when Niall asks what he should do.

Niall frowns and picks at his fingernail. That’s the last thing he wanted to hear. “He’s gorgeous, though,” Niall argues. “And like…”

“Why are you paying for this if you’ve got a shot at the actual thing?” Louis asks, cutting him off. “Think about it. He came out to you. He thinks you’re fit. He listens to what you have to say, like with the glasses thing. He’s obviously got some sort of a _thing_ for you. Stop paying for it and go after the real thing. Before he finds out.”

“He’ll notice. He’ll put the pieces together, and then I’m really fucked,” Niall says, eyes trained on the ground.

Louis rolls his eyes. “You’re giving Harry too much credit. He’s got tons of customers and I bet they come and go. Skip a show here and there and then disappear completely. He’ll never realize,” Louis advises. “But if you keep going I’m almost positive you’re going to get caught. That’s just how this stuff goes.”

Niall nods, because he knows. He’s more afraid of how Harry will react if he finds out than if he puts the pieces together on his own. If he’s caught in the act, it’ll suck.

“Yeah,” Niall nods, speaking absentmindedly. “You’re right. Thanks, Tommo.”

“Of course,” Louis smiles.

School keeps them busy for the rest of the week, Harry especially, so Niall doesn’t get to see him much. He’s managed to gather the courage to ask Harry on Friday after class if he wants to go out to the pub, a laid-back kind of thing that seems like a date but also seems like it’s _not_ , to sort of test the waters. Except Harry’s not in their room like he usually is – and he’s left a note on the desk.

 **Had to pick up an extra**  
shift tonight. Need the  
$$ !! See you later.  
                H. xxx

Niall tries not to look too much into Harry’s _three_ x’s after his name, but then it hits him. Work. A surprise cam show?

He scrambles for his computer like an addict searching for his drug, and he pulls open the website with reckless abandon. The username and password flow naturally from his fingertips; he’s logged in more than he should admit. He knows this is wrong but he can’t help it. Just one last show is all he needs.

Harry isn’t online yet, but Niall sets up his computer at his desk and gets comfortable, credit card out on the counter so he can pay for one last mind-blowing show before he quits. He especially wants to spend a lot because Harry’s gone out of his way to do a show on a Friday night; he deserves every penny.

After an hour, Harry still hasn’t logged on.

While he waits, Niall decides to pull out some revision and work on it, since it’s right there at his desk staring at him, judging him for what he’s doing. He’s alone at his desk on a Friday night, waiting for his roommate to do a cam show. He tries to ignore the voices in his head telling him how pathetic he is.

Somewhere between his revision for maths and his reading assignment for nineteenth century literature, Niall falls asleep at his desk. His computer is still open to the website where he’s waiting for Harry to arrive, and it’ll ding when he gets there. Except it still hasn’t.

He wakes with a start when the door shuts loudly, and he looks first at his computer and then searches the room through the dark, groggy and confused.

Harry’s standing in the doorway staring across the room at Niall and his open laptop. As Niall realizes who made the noise, he sees the expression on Harry’s face turn from cheerful to betrayed and hurt. “Harry, no – wait!” Niall begs as he watches Harry turn on his heel to leave.

Harry clearly wants to run, but a bigger part of him turns on his heel and asks, “How do you know about that?”

All it takes is one good look for Niall to realize that being a cam boy isn’t Harry’s only job. He’s got on an apron and clearly smells of a café – and Niall feels incredibly stupid at his assumptions. “I – before we met, I -,” Niall stammers.

“How long have you subscribed?” Harry asks, his voice dripping with hurt. “Why didn’t you stop when we…?” His hands come up to cover his face. The humiliation is too much; he can’t look Niall in the eye now. Not when he knows.

Niall closes his laptop. “I’m sorry. It’s not like I knew we’d be roommates, though! I’ve subscribed for like… a year now.”

“But you kept watching,” Harry says, and Niall thinks it sounds a bit like Harry’s crying. “You’re NaughtyIrish13, aren’t you? That’s why you didn’t pay for anything that one night. Because of what I said about you.” He pauses. “And then you took me out for breakfast when I said… _god_ this is fucked up.”

Niall’s never heard Harry curse in this context, not as he’s putting together pieces of the weirdest and most embarrassing puzzle he’s ever done. Harry is red-faced and too mortified to meet Niall’s eyes as he says, “I need to go.”

He turns toward the door and doesn’t chance a look back as he leaves Niall in their dorm room, all alone.

Niall can’t sleep that night. He’s worried about Harry and guilty about what he did and really just wants to try to explain things to Harry. He wants to apologize for embarrassing and tell him why he stuck around – that he’s drawn to him, for the sex but for so much more, too. His worry grows when Harry doesn’t come back for the rest of the weekend, and he’s not around on Monday, either.

Niall would worry that he’d moved out but all of his things are still in their room, even after the huge chunk of time where Niall’s in class and Harry would know he’d have the room to himself. It takes Louis about ten minutes to catch on that something’s wrong, and he’s not surprised in the least at what happened after Niall explains it to him. “You’re an idiot, Nialler. An absolute idiot,” he says.

And Niall knows he is.

He’s tempted to stay offline that night, but Louis tells him not to. “I have a plan, but you just have to trust me. I know all the right people,” Louis says.

Being as Niall’s dug himself this giant hole and Louis is willing to help him out of it, Niall agrees.

He’s heard Louis’s plan at least a dozen times, memorized every detail of it, and that night Niall finds himself sitting down to his laptop for Harry’s show one last time.

It feels so wrong and terrible now, logging into his account and entering the video room for Harry Cox. He knows he needs to cancel the subscription after this and seeing the look on Harry’s face, the total mortification, will make that so much easier for Niall now. He would have cancelled already if it wasn’t for Louis and his plan.

As predicted, Harry is there in the video chat, waiting for his customers. His face changes when he sees Niall’s username. He looks directly into the camera and Niall can’t figure out what the expression means. He’s half expecting Harry to kick him out of the room. “Yes, BWinston1981, tonight _is_ bid night. Highest bidder gets to choose how I get off tonight,” Harry says.

Niall’s heart pumps harder. He’d forgotten that detail. He hopes like hell he can out-bid the rest.

When bidding starts, it’s extremely fast. The other men in the room have good amounts of money to offer, but Niall keeps outbidding. He’s got weeks’ worth saved up again.

In the end, it’s down to Niall and BradfordBadBoii. Niall offers every cent he has left and thankfully, he wins. Harry looks livid but masks it pretty well. “Congratulations, NaughtyIrish13,” he says with no conviction. It’s the least genuine he’s ever sounded. “Let’s get started, shall we?”

Now it’s Louis’s turn to step in. He’s been sitting on Niall’s bed behind him, watching and encouraging him and randomly cursing at other bidders. Now he takes Niall’s seat at the desk in front of Niall’s laptop, handing off a set of keys in the process. Louis starts typing as Niall rushes out the door to Louis’s car.

Louis keeps Niall updated on the cam show in text messages while Niall drives through London to the address Louis had wormed out of Harry. Apparently he films all of his cam shows at his friend Nick’s apartment while he’s out. Niall tries not to get too jealous of this Nick guy, tries not to think about what those two could have.

There’s a guy standing at the front of Nick’s building, a set of keys in hand. “Hey,” he says. He’s tall with a nice quiff in his hair and some facial hair. He’s got on some jeans and a plaid shirt like Niall often wears, and he says, “You must be Niall? I’m Liam.”

Louis had talked to his friend Liam – who was friends with Harry – and worked out the rest of the plan from there. Liam’s always stationed toward the front of Nick’s flat so he can keep watch and warn Nick if the show’s going late or if someone else has come by to surprise Nick. He’s the loyal watchdog, and he’s going to let Louis in.

“Hi,” Niall says awkwardly. “Is he up there still?”

“I wouldn’t be here if he wasn’t,” Liam says, half grimacing. “Good luck, mate.”

Niall nods. He’s nervous and can’t really say anything in reply because he knows he needs the luck. He knows full well he could be well and truly fucked out of any sort of friendship or relationship with Harry after what he’s done.

When he gets into the flat, he looks around and realizes how completely average it is. It always looked so idealized and perfect in the cam shows but it’s just… a flat. It’s boring. Niall takes a deep breath and walks the route Louis had told him to walk – through the kitchen, down the hallway, last door on the right. Niall pauses outside the door to take a deep breath and hears Harry say, “This is the slowest foreplay I’ve ever done.”

Louis promised he’d do that, draw it out so Harry’s not naked and half-hard when Niall gets there to have a serious talk. He slowly turns the doorknob and walks into the room. Harry freezes and turns around, and Niall can see the camera setup and the chat room blowing up on the screen as he walks inside. “Niall?” Harry asks, shocked and breathless. “But you…”

He points over his shoulder at the laptop with his thumb, and his eyes are wide and he’s clearly confused. Niall takes a deep breath and nods. “I know. I needed to talk to you. That’s… well, I’ve got a friend helping me out. Stalling, so I could get here. Can you take a break tonight?”

Niall’s eyes dart to the laptop screen and Harry hesitates before he turns and kneels down to be eye level with the camera again. “I really need to go, you guys. This is important. Sorry everyone. I promise I’ll be back next week.”

He switches off the camera and Niall feels an ache in his chest because Harry’s going to keep doing this, keep putting himself out there for creepy people just like him who would pay Harry to do those things to himself.

When everything is shut off, Niall closes the door and walks over to Harry. He sits down on the sofa next to him – he’s so envious of anyone with a room big enough for a bed _and_ a sofa – and pats the cushion next to him so Harry will sit down again. Harry does it without question, but avoids Niall’s eyes again.

“I’m sorry,” Niall begins. “I know that doesn’t even begin to cover it, but… I mean it. I should have stopped.”

“Yes, you should have,” Harry nods.

Niall sighs and looks over at Harry for a moment. “I didn’t want to stop because… I guess I had this sick hope that you’d say something about me… something good. _God_ when I found out we were roommates I was so happy because like…” he takes a deep breath. “I like you. Like, as a person.”

“You can’t tell that from the shows,” Harry snaps. “I don’t show that part of me on the cam shows.”

“You have,” Niall says. “You didn’t try, you just did. Like the day you were sick. Cosy hoodies and tea? Or your glasses. And the way you would sometimes talk about your day, about how you sat at a café all day waiting for the show, or…”

“It’s called acting, Niall,” Harry says simply.

“But you do some of that stuff for real,” Niall argues.

Harry’s quiet. Niall thinks that maybe he’s won that argument, that he’s shown Harry that he knows what he’s talking about. He waits a beat before he continues, “And then I didn’t stop because you were so bummed out about your best customer ditching you, and I felt so bad because that was _me_ and I know what it’s like to be a broke uni kid. Trust me. And… I just wanted to support you without making it obvious or making you feel like a charity case.”

“Other people would have paid. People wait, and then they pay,” Harry explains.

Niall frowns. “I don’t know all this now, do I?” he asks, embarrassed. His right hand reaches up to scratch the back of his neck and he says, “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”

Harry still doesn’t speak. Niall thinks maybe Harry’s just waiting for him to leave.

“And another reason why I didn’t stop was because I have feelings for you. Not because of the sex.” Harry snorts. “Okay, sort of because of the sex but mostly because of you. Because you’re sweet and kind and we could sit down with tea and food and talk for hours and you care what I think and I care what you think and I liked that. I’ve never had that and I’ve been scared as hell for that to happen to me with a bloke and then… then you happened and I wanted it _so bad_. With you.”

“Not because of the cam shows?”

“No,” Niall shakes his head. “I knew that was just sex. And I know that’s all just… for show. I have no idea what you’re actually like in bed. I just know you from what I’ve seen and experienced living with you. And like… I’d wipe my memory of all the cam shows if it would prove to you that I want you for you.”

“And you know, that technology would have to exist outside of movies, too…”

Niall snorts with laughter because that’s the bigger issue with his whole suggestion of wiping his memory, but he’d moved past that so easily. But Harry lightened the mood with it and that makes Niall feel better – more relaxed. “Yeah, that too,” he agrees.

He looks up at Harry nervously, like he’s scared that even though they’re laughing together, they’re over. But Harry’s got a sort-of smile on his face too, and nothing has ever felt better.

“I hope you know I’m going to make you wait so long for _everything_. As my little revenge.”

“As in…?” Niall asks, too hopeful to ask if this is really happening, if they’re really going to give this a shot.

“I don’t trust you yet, and this is all… a massive violation of privacy,” Harry begins. “But I like spending time with you, too. And maybe we can give this a shot. Build everything up. Sexual tension and all.”

Niall’s too happy to speak. He just beams, nodding eagerly because of _course_ he’ll give that to Harry if he wants. He’d wait months – no, _years_ – for a chance with this guy.

“And _no more subscribing_ ,” Harry says firmly. “I mean it.”

“I promise,” Niall says. “I’ll unsubscribe right now if you want. Just to prove I mean it.”

Harry shakes his head, because this will be Niall’s first test and he’s going to hold him to it. “I’m going to keep doing it, though. At least a little longer. I need the money until next year when I’m certified to work in a daycare.”

Niall snorts, and Harry knows how ridiculous that sounds. His current job and his future career goals sound absolutely terrible together – a secret he’d rather like to take to the grave – but he thinks he’s doing pretty well so far.

“Can I have a kiss at least? Before I take you home?” Niall jokes.

Harry shakes his head, making Niall hesitate and his smile drop a little, and then Harry says, “Maybe tonight before bed, if you’re lucky. I told you I’d make you wait.”

Niall laughs and does his best to be sweet the whole way home.

As it turns out, Harry can’t hold out as well as he says he can. After arriving back to their dorm, the two of them spend nearly an hour making out on Niall’s bed.

Niall’s never been happier, and if the grin on Harry’s face is anything to go by, he hasn’t either.


End file.
